Voy Por Ustedes

Nick Clegg and his band of Loony-Toon, hummus eating, nudists have been taken to the cleaners this week by all and sundry - metaphorically speaking of course. They are the biggest 'Emperor's new clothes" moment of this election campaign since Gordon Brown last claimed to have saved the planet.

While exposing themselves in front of the public is not something they're usually bashful about in their private lives, it's a different matter when their politics become exposed quite so starkly and with such ease. Vince Cable for example, was made to look really rather pathetic this afternoon by Andrew Neill and Stephanie Flanders during the Chancellors debate while Osborne and Alistair Darling looked on with distinct smirks on their faces.

Nick Clegg too has received a rather swift fall from grace. His past has caught up with him. All those people who thought he was Britain's Barack Obama only not quite so cool, have now been presented with the truth in the form of his C.V. and expenses receipts. As a previous Lobbyist, MEP and photo-copier in a Helsinki bank he can hardly be considered to be offering something new. And his maximum allowed expense claims, which included the pruning of his plum trees and hedgerows are clearly an example of what a duplicitous money grabber and enthusiastic dogger he is. He is a new kind of politics if England have the best chance they've ever had this year of winning the World Cup.

But though, the Lib-Dems essentially play "Cuckoo politics", with their policies and how they build support for them. As we all know the Cuckoo does not build its own nest. It simply hoodwinks other birds into incubating their eggs for them.

They plonk their eggs into other birds' nests - they look the same as the other eggs so the poor bird is none-the-wiser. Only when the thing hatches days before the other eggs and a dirty great Cuckoo emerges and shoves the other eggs out of the nest is the truth exposed.

The Lib-Dems don't have policies of their own. They steal those of the other parties depending on which area of the country they're campaigning. And when they're presented to the electorate they sort of look the same, but there's something a bit different about them. But by the time they've been exposed it's too late. All those people who can't think for themselves have signed up for the Lib-Dem cause and the real policies of the other parties are dropped out of the public debate like the real eggs out of those nests.

So when I say the Lib-Dems' have been rumbled, I mean they've been rumbled by people like me who stay at home all day watching politics shows and reading blogs and newspapers, only stopping for sandwiches, snoozes and wanks (oh my), but anyone even remotely informed would never have fallen for their nonsense in the first place...but what about regular people? People with jobs and people who haven't read a book since they were at school? Are they aware of what a collection of charlatans and swingers the Lib-Dems really are? No...and hereby we have the genius of cuckoo politics.

They don't mind being humiliated at 2pm, as they know no one is watching. Eeek, it's quite scary really! What if I'm the only one who's been watching the telly? Was I the only viewer who watched this afternoon as Vince Cable literally shit himself under the questioning of young Stephanie Flanders?

There's another Leadership Debate tomorrow, but it's on Sky News so only people with Sky TV can watch it and it clashes with the Darts, so I'm estimating only about two million people will watch it ..or two "millions" as Gordon Brown would infuriatingly say. It looks as if the Lib-Dem's political incubation will continue then right under our own arses. Jees...someone call someone. The people have got to know.

Labels: Nonsense, Politics