This interview is very difficult to watch. Not because you share Gordon Brown's pain - I myself wish nothing but pain on the man - it's just difficult because it's so inappropriate for a Prime Minister of Great Britain to be conducting himself in this way. It's further evidence that this once great nation is in real terms no more relevant to anything in this day an age than Betamax videos and Belgium and this is the real crying shame.
World leaders should be looked at with a certain degree of reverence. They should be detached. They should carry an air of superioroity. You don't want the leader of your country to be someone you might meet in a pub or in a supermarket. I don't want to imagine the British Prime Minister struggling with some DIY or making tea in his dressing gown.
I don't want to know what kind of underwear the Prime Minister wears. I don't want to know that he farts in bed and has a propensity to cum very quickly when his anus is tickled. I don't even want to know this sort of thing about Jonathon Ross or Peter Andre, although if it was Myleen Klass I'd be hard pressed not to lend an ear to the conversation.
One doesn't doubt his tears are genuine when he talks about the death of his daughter, but I don't for a second believe this whole episode wasn't cooked up as a means of engineering a more voter-friendly countenance for Gordon Brown with a General Election just around the corner.
It's really not a stretch of the imagination to imagine Brown being advised one morning by an 'orrible advising cunt that he really needs to cry on telly to appear more human and the best way to achieve this is to talk about you're personal tragedies.
Either that or imagine how he felt that day when Tony Blair decided not to retire after all and carry on as PM for another term - anything that'll make you cry. Gordon Brown was after all very critical of Cameron when he was so keen to invite the media into his life when his own son died; "I will never use my family for political ends", remember that comment Gordon?
I think Gordon Brown's emotional depth is revealed rather starkly with this little exchange in his interview when they discuss the death of previous Labour leader John Smith:
PM: “Let me take you back to the day before John Smith died, where for all intents and purposes he was absolutely fine. In your head Gordon, if you’re honest, you must have been not just hoping but believing you would be, after John Smith, the next Labour leader.”
GB: “I thought that would be possible and the first person I phoned when I heard John had died was Tony. And I said, ‘Look, Tony, you may not know this but John has died.’ So I said, ‘Look, we’ve got to sort this out', and so we started a conversation.”
They haven't mentioned this in the media, they're focusing on his crying, but John Smith dies and the first person Gordon Brown calls was not Smith's wife or any other family member it was Tony Blair to thrash out who was going to get the top job. Bastard.
It's very sad of course that their wee ones have died, but there used to be a reluctance in this country for people to burden people with their personal problems, let alone politicians. Now the opposite seems to be the case. Our streets are filled with all and sundry doing their dirty washing in public.
Of course, we can blame America for this. Oprah Winfrey and Presidential election campaigns have collided creating monsters like Fern Britton and Lorraine Kelly and caused us to adopt a more touchy-feely approach to our politics and it's jolly well enough to make you vomit up your crumpets.
Oprah let's face it is the modern day equivalent of those cockney freak show hosts of Victorian London who'd dare the public to feast their eyes on natures most hideous physical aberrations in the shape of Elephant man type people who were kept chained to walls when they weren't being gawped at and beaten with sticks at regular intervals.
Roll up roll up, you'll 'a never seen the likes of it
Oprah has re-marketed these freak shows as human-interest stories. And it is in this name that she parades the most desperate cases of suffering and tragedy in front of her live audience of captivated housewives and the cabillion other similar housewives watching at home in turquoise sweat pants and a full inch of make-up.
Out they're brought, like the woman who had her face ripped off by a monkey or the 12 year old boy who weighs the same as all the other members of his family put together.
Monkey woman's head is covered in a towel so as to raise the level of heebie jeebies to the maximum and elevate the level of gasps to such a degree that the poor woman's hair is messed up by the prevailing winds when her hideous features are finally uncovered.
Consequently US politicians have had no choice but to subject themselves to this most intense scrutiny. They are forced to stand back while a light is shined on the deepest darkest corners of their lives and the folds of fat guarding their most intimates parts are rolled back for all to see.
Obviously we have to follow suit, because that's how we roll in this country now and Gordon Brown is the perfect storm of "human interest" story. A high profile figure, with emotional scars as deep and unpleasant and his physical ones. A repulsive figure in every respect who, had he be born a hundred years previous, would be kept in a cage and beaten with rubber hoses as he stood before a captivated sickened public, making the most futile attempts to appear human while he was pelted with rotten cabbage.
Hence therefore on Saturday you'll try in vain to back swallow hard to keep your dinner down while Gordon Brown tries to win a modicum of sympathy with the country because he's lost a daughter and an eye and tears of sympathy are falling from his good eye as Piers Morgan looks on with a thinly veiled look of almost sexual pleasure in his two good eyes.
Of course this is lost on our PM. He and his advisers seem oblivious, completely unaware of how he is viewed by the public despite the fact that his popularity has only ever fallen as the nation has gotten to know him, simply because he is so fundamentally unlikeable.
And any further attempts on his part to ingratiate himself to the voters is doomed to failure. His own civil servants were desperate for him to call a snap election just as he was given the keys to Number 10 in case the country had any time to get to know him.
Cameron needs to take note here. His defining characteristic is clearly how much of an utter lying duplicitous cunt he is and he needs to use Gordon Brown's humiliation at the hands of archetypal tabloid journo Piers Morgan as an example of what not to do. Forget inviting people into his life. He needs to appear more distant, much much more distant. Ideally to emigrate to Haiti, but failing this, a more austere approach to his campaigning at the least.
Cameron trying to cry, but only succeeding
in laughing at a poor person yesterdayWe won't get this of course because he is so terrified of seeming aloof and public schoolboyish. So we can unfortunately expect to see Cameron attempt to "out emotion" Gordon Brown in a further interview, probably with Fern Britton where he will also talk about the death of his son and how he's coping with the other problems his kids have and probably where he was when his wife first sucked his balls and how he still really likes Wham.
I may be wrong, but I don't think the Times ever cornered Churchill before he set about giving Jerry and good pasting and asked him about his underwear or where he first took Clementine over the jumps. A lesson in this for us all I think. A lesson in this for us all.
Crosby whose mother isn't a whore after all.
Tazer, yesterday: the best centre in the NHL I think you'll find
