Utter C words

6/01/2009 02:14:00 pm / The truth was spoken by Rich /

I've recently under-taken a quest to get someone to say the C word and it's proving difficult. But surely all I have to do is get them to delve into the recent past of this man because he really is the very definition of an utter c**t.

He's been caught with his fingers in the till. He claims it was an error. Clearly they're all at it, but when it's the fucking Chancellor of the Exchequer it becomes more significant.

If it's a genuine mistake then that means he's incapable of organising his own finances, which are obviously far less complex than the nations therefore he can't be trusting with the nation's purse strings.

The alternative is that he's conniving bastard or cunt if you will, and knew exactly what he was doing and is therefore untrustworthy and should not be allowed within 100 miles of 11 Downing Street

Now I hate Hazel Blears and her silly garden gnome like features as much as the next voter, but I fail to see how her fiddles were deemed unacceptable by Gordon Brown even though it was another "genuine error" and she paid the money back, but Alistair Darling's fiddles can be met with his full support.

Because of the fungibility of money there's very little that can be done about all this. There can be no transparent expenses system because by their nature they are manipulable so a new "transparent" system or just having an election and replacing all of them with celeb MP's and random individuals are both just palliative measures.

Just because you give an MP £100 to buy a table doesn't mean they actually spent your money on a table, even if they show you one and have a receipt. All you can sure about is that you made them £100 better off. The only way you can assured of where this money went is if MPs filed requisition forms for the things they need and the expenses department dudes actually bought the stuff for them, which is obviously impossible given the number of MPs and all the crap they need.

It would be far cheaper for the nation if they were all transported to the south pole and a ruthless dictator take over for a while until we can be trusted to run the country ourselves again. I've been saying this years. Why will no one listen to me damn it. We don't live in a democratic country. So very little will change from an ideological point of view.

But a seriously unhinged dictator will remove those horrible hooded urchins from our street corners, he'd make the trains run on time and we'd have some really cool military rallies like the North Koreans and Chinesers do and in time an awesome new series of wars with France as an exercise in national cock waving, which will be a piece of piss since France have been a vanquished nation since the Jormans invasion in World War II.

The future

It's a plan with no flaws. I'm telling you. Dictatorships for the win!!



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