Entering via the backdoor

6/07/2009 06:44:00 pm / The truth was spoken by Rich /

We've got a gay couple living in our street now. I've seen them a couple of times taking walks together and I saw them in the Spar a couple of nights ago buying French apples and a copy of the Guardian.

I hope they can persuaded to move on before a whole load of them move in. This is what happens you know. You let one couple in and the next thing you know the whole street is an absolute fleet of berties, everyone's flying rainbow coloured flags and you can't move for all the vans delivering Futons.

* * *

I've also got a problem with Ants. My Dad gave me something which poisons the whole nest! I know they're only ants and all but I don't want to be responsible for an ant holocaust. There's something very Final Solution about this product. It's called "Raid" but they might as well call it "Reich".

The box has pictures of ants dying on it. It's really quite unnerving and unnecessary if you ask me. I just want something I can put around the doors and windows or something like that..something that deters them from entering via the backdoor. Something those whoopsies could do with too as it goes.

I'm sure ants do some good? I don't want to wipe them out. I'm a man of peace. Except when it comes to spiders obviously.




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