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"by showing people that

we have the vision of the future
that will carry this country
optimistically in my view into
its next phase."

Huh? What in the name of Jesus and all those he fucked, does that mean? This was Gordon Brown's plan of attack for assuaging the rage and raw hatred being directed at him and his Government by almost everyone now. It's not a very confident plan though is it people.

Let's ignore for a second that it's rhetorical political non-speak - only Americans can talk more than politicians without actually saying anything - let's focus on how he's actually phrased his strategy:

He reckons they have the vision of the future that will carry this country into it's next phase. But he thinks this is an optimistic vision? In other words, we reckon at a push we can make the progression into it's next phase, but we're odds against. Oh spiffing. Well, that'll stop my Dad rationing bread and petrol then.

And what in tarnation is "it's next phase.?" I hate hate hate hate this kind of language. It doesn't fucking mean anything. Aarrrggghhhh. This kind of horse hockey irritates me more than women who want to know where their relationships are "going." What do you fucking mean where's it going???

If Gordon Brown wanted to halt the growing number of people desperate to see him developing an aggressive form of bollock cancer then he ought to just stop being such a patronising wanker and stop speaking in clichés and sound bites.

All he's basically said here is he wants the future of Britain to be significantly better than it is now. He hasn't gone as far as to answer the question and let us know how he's going to go about it.

I could have the vision of the future to take this country into it's next phase (isn't that a tautology anyway) but if it's next phase is an economic depression where we all start eating each other because we can't afford to buy biscuits, it won't win me any elections.

Next time I'm asked where my relationship is going I shall reply that for any relationship to progress to the next phase it requires vision, a vision for the future that involves compromise and a consensus view and there have been 63% more compromises with me than with any of your previous partners. I am for listening and a brighter future, they were for silence and watching football.

I just hope the next phase of his career involves someone close to him taking him out to the barn with a shot gun and putting him out of his misery. If the gun happens to misfire once or twice all's the better, it's really the kindest thing to do.