I usually like to knock out a top 5 females of the year list around about January, so let's do that now shall we. The qualities I'm looking for are combinations of beauty, intellect and a variety of exotic features that are scarce in West Oxfordshire.
There's a couple of things that will always make me swoon. Swoon in a masculine way obviously. I'm a sucker for exaggerated facial features; wonky mouths especially. I'm also quite keen on almond shaped eyes and I prefer the smaller French breast as opposed to the pendulum swinging melon.
I find IQ points very sexy, possibly because of my own almost freakish levels of intelligence and I'm quite keen on women with mens names too. I can't explain that though and I'm scared to look within myself to find out why. So anyway with all that in mind:
1. Jen Mason.
If there's a more exciting arrangement of facial features on a female poker player it'll be enough to make a man forget to get old and forget to die. Delicious, and she's probably forgotten more about poker than I'll ever know.2. Georgie Thompson
A bowl of crunchy nut corn flakes and Georgie Thompson talking about Arsenal is all I need to get me ready for the day when I arise in the early afternoon. The husky voice, the saucy wink, the loosely housed pert bouncers. Marvelous.3. Jessica Alba
I had no idea who this lovely creature was until last Wednesday I think, when I watched the Fantastic Four for the first time. I'm a Spider-man man myself when it comes to comic book heroes so I had no real interest in watching this until I saw her sporting that blue body suit. I don't know if she's intelligent but you can bounce a coin off her tushy and on this occasion that's enough to warrant her inclusion here.
4. Sarah Beeney
I had no idea who this lovely creature was until last Wednesday I think, when I watched the Fantastic Four for the first time. I'm a Spider-man man myself when it comes to comic book heroes so I had no real interest in watching this until I saw her sporting that blue body suit. I don't know if she's intelligent but you can bounce a coin off her tushy and on this occasion that's enough to warrant her inclusion here.4. Sarah Beeney
I'm including Sarah Beeney because I enjoy a challenge. I fear she's too much woman for me really, but I like a woman with spirit, I do I do. Her poonts are rather more generous that I prefer - but you'd save an awful lot of money on your heating bills if young Sarah was around to keep you warm I'll wager.
5. Daisy McAndrew
Now then, Daisy is an interesting selection. She used to co-present the Daily Politics on BBC2 with Andrew Neil where she was still known as Daisy Samson, but I think has now switched to the other side. She would have ranked higher had she not abandoned any sense of pride in her physical appearance once she was married, as all women seem want to do, and grown an arse that now has it's own moons.
5. Daisy McAndrew
Now then, Daisy is an interesting selection. She used to co-present the Daily Politics on BBC2 with Andrew Neil where she was still known as Daisy Samson, but I think has now switched to the other side. She would have ranked higher had she not abandoned any sense of pride in her physical appearance once she was married, as all women seem want to do, and grown an arse that now has it's own moons.
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