In your face Mugabe

6/25/2008 10:20:00 pm / The truth was spoken by Rich /

"On the recommendation of the Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs, Her Majesty The Queen has approved that the appointment of President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe to be an honorary Knight Grand Cross in the Civil Division of The Most Honourable Order of Bath be cancelled and annulled and that his name be removed from the Register of Honorary Members of that Order.

"This action has been taken as a mark of revulsion at the abuse of human rights and abject disregard for the democratic process in Zimbabwe over which President Mugabe has presided."

That's what I'm talking about Ma'am. That'll show him. Fuck with democracy will you Robert? Starve your own people is it? Well we'll have that medal back then; the Register of Honourary Members of the Order will manage just fine without you thank you very much.

Mugabe: Gutted at losing his right to the GCB suffix

They've managed since they stripped Prince Naseem Hamed and Lester Piggott of theirs and they'll cope without you fella. And if you think your boys are coming over here to play some cricket later in the summer, well I'm afraid you're very much mistaken.

God bless the Queen, she's not afraid to bare her teeth in the face of tyranny. If that doesn't restore order to that country, frankly, I don't know what will. I jest of course, but while this is a highly embarrassing and hollow gesture on our part; the United Kingdom, while once we presided over the greatest empire in all of yooman history - in real terms, we've done about as much as we can for the Zimbabweans on this issue.

We can't intervene, we've no one to intervene with. We could helicopter the cubs in with some sharp sticks, and maybe the St Johns Ambulance people just in case anyone sprains an ankle, but I can't really see them succeeding unless they can organise a jamboree and thrash out a deal with Mugabe over sausages and hot chocolate with marsh mallows.

See now we've been here before. Once we've occupied a land and run off when we've out stayed our welcome there's no going back. India and Palestine are the two more sorry episodes of grace falling.

It's all very well and good being completely horrified on behalf of the starving Zimbabweans, but what good does a stern letter to the Guardian do them? Unless you're prepared to smuggle yourself in there and shoot the guy, what benefit is there in being outraged. We're impotent as far as patrolling the globe is concerned. We've been reduced to stripping despots of antiquated honourary titles and ratcheting up the rhetoric.

I feel bad for them of course, but it's a shit world and I have to ration out my outrage and sympathy. I'm afraid I'm more concerned with how much my own country stinks than the plight of random global deteriorating democracies. Which is no more selfish than it is absurd to think we can have any influence whatsoever in any part of the world ever again. And you can quote me.

By the way, this is where Zimbabwe is at:


2 comments:

Comment by Alan on 26 June 2008 at 06:33

I assume the pic showing the location of Zimbabwe was for the benefit of your American reader(s)?

However, I fear that showing Africa in isolation may not really be of much help to them! :-)

Comment by Rich on 26 June 2008 at 15:40

Ha, it's a good point. I was giving them too much credit.

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