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I tell you what, I'm just watch now watching Brazil v Portugal and it has to be said that Ronaldo is an incredibly ugly footballer. I'm not talking about his facial features, although to me he looks he looks like a shemale, I mean the way he plays the game.

His tricks and step-overs and silly back heels are effective, but it's incredibly ugly to watch and mostly unnecessary. He's all knees and elbows and splashes of hair gel. It's some sort of football Riverdance bullshit. A show pony with silly oiled nipples and a lemon scented penis I should think.

Lionel Messi on the other hand may play for one of the most evil and cowardly nations on the planet, but he knows how to play the beautiful game. He IS the beautiful game people. He's everything Ronaldo isn't. He's humble, quiet and has a face like a slapped arse, but he floats about the pitch like some sort of specter. Ghosting past people with subtle body movements and speed that belies his little squat body. No need for thirty step overs, just a slight dropping of the shoulder and he's away.

Lionel Messi is a genius. Where as Ronaldo's tricks are an end in themselves rather than a means to end, Messi uses a master plan to make his way through an entire defense. It's all calculated in a split second and then executed even faster and six or seven defenders are left with nothing but a distinct whiff of Old Spice in the air and sense they've just been made to look very silly.

It's a shame really that Messi's team will be run through with Mexican steel on Sunday as I'd love to see more of him, but there's no room for sentiment here people - he must be slughtered. Ronaldo on the other hand I could do with seeing much less of.