Voy Por Ustedes

So it's the last week of the regular season in the Mercan nogger today and what an intriguing set of circumstances we have laid before us. Very complex play-off permutations - far too complicated to comprehend to the extent that I could explain it here and who cares anyway that's what I always say. I certainly don't and I doubt you do either. Am I right or am I right or am I right? Right, right?

I've never had one come in completely, but I have placed a wee £5 Yankee on the following four confrontations (which I'll thank you not to follow unless of course losing money sexually arouses you)..actually before we begin, I feel quite good about these efforts as it goes, or as good as one can feel given that I've done the minimum of research and the entire regular season has been an enigma, sprinkled with illusion and wrapped in a puzzle.

Now then without further ado, part one: the Miami Dolphins travel to New York for a game that could see Miami as the most unlikely winners of the AFC East. Miami were 1-15 last season, but Tony Sparano has turned them around and probably threatened a few people along the way and almost certainly has some members of the New York Jets coaching staff in the boot of his car as we speak. It's too close to call a winner, but I thought the scoring records of both teams suggests overs (42) is the bet here.

Any game involving Brett Favre is bound to be open and this one has the potential to get out of hand. Miami score roughly 22 points a game and concede about 20, New York concede about 22 points a game and score something like 25.

That's as deep as I'm going research wise. I don't know what the weather's like in the swamps of New Jersey today, probably snowing and 40mph winds, making scoring impossible, but hayell - I'm prepared to take a chance - and why not?

Elsewhere I've chosen San Fransisco to beat a completely unmotivated and frankly piss poor Washington Redskins. My team promised so much in the first third of the season, but ultimately failed to deliver when push was required to come to shove they were capable only of a flirtatious tickle.

I can't imagine the Skins are going to be too keyed up about a 4,000 mile meaningless trip to the West coast. I'm sure they're all thinking about their holidays, drinking cocktails and asking Peurto Rican waitresses if they do it doggy doggy so a -3 handicap shouldn't be too much of an obstacle for the 49ers.

I shall now contradict myself somewhat with my third selection as I've backed San Fransisco's neighbours, the Oakland Raiders to win on the handicaps. They're traveling 4,000 miles but in the other direction to see out their god awful season against Tampa Bay who I think have only a slim gnats fanny hair of a chance of making the post-season.

In fact they may be out of it already, but either way I'm going for Oakland because ...because because because becaaaaaause, because of the wonderful things they does...I do apologise, I've been bursting into song a lot recently, I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me.


My golden rule for the handicaps wagering is never back a side in the NFL who have to overcome a handicap of over 10. It's a rather simplictic rule, but it's a fairly important one. You may be able to do this with the College games when so often the disparity in skill between the two teams is vast, but not so in the NFL. Even the shittest teams are very rarely 10 points worse than the bestest. Oakland have shown some signs of promise this year so I'm happy to gamble on a 13 point head start being good enough for them to see this one out. I am you know.

Finally, I've gone for New England to beat Buffalo by more than 6 points. A price of 10/11 seems generous to me. I can't see New England having any problems with this one and if I do say so myself, this is the selection I'm most confident about. So there.


Alrighty then. Good luck me and good luck with all your bets you.