You see now, the thing about that is, there are millions of people, in some cases, educated people too, that actually believe it and take the Bible literally. We’re living in an age where man can pay to go on holiday in space and we have computers capable of beating the Russians at Chess, yet still people are susceptible to this kind of absurd blind faith and super-natural nonsense.
To give some scale to how astonishing it is that in this day and age we still extend any kind of respect to religious types who not only insist on the Universe being of Intelligent Design, but who also insist that we believe it too, despite any real-life tangible evidence of God’s existence, I shall ask you to consider the experiences of Captain Ortega from the Snorks cartoon.
Now then, if you’re not familiar with this cartoon, allow me to introduce you to it (the intro is in Japanese, but you can guess what's going on).
So, Captain Ortega is attaked by pirates, his boat sinks and when he's at the bottom of the sea he sees the Snorks and makes a note of them in his log book.
Well now imagine Captain Ortega in a Tavern somewhere in deepest Bristol, or Brizzle, as the locals call it. Captain Ortega and his bluff old sea-dog mates drinking ale and farting and bedding wenches and so on. With his pipe lit and the fire place cracking away he begins a tale of his last voyage, his vessel was sunk by pirates and as he drifted to bottom of Davey Jones’ locker he saw a bunch of creatures with snorkels coming out of their heads looking through the glass at him and then swimming off. He’d explain how they were no bigger than a horse’s bollock and how they’d laughed and smiled at him.
Obviously, everyone would then laugh at Cap’in Ortega and shout har-harghhh me hearty, and then clap old Ortega on the back for spinning such a yarn and they’d be off bedding more wenches, giving them a different sort of clap.
Captain Ortega would of course, insist that it was true and show them his log book, but obviously without any real proof he’d have no chance at all of persuading them of these amazing creatures and he’d laugh too and then go off and die of scurvy and that would be the end of it.
Three hundred years later, some historian would discover his log book which detailed the meeting Ortega had with the Snorks and what would he conclude from such an incredible entry in an authentic Captains log? He’d think the dude was drunk at the time and had seen some crazy fish or something and no more would be thought of it.
However, swap the Snork for God and his logbook for the Bible and you can expect to be burnt if don’t damn well believe it’s true. No evidence required, only blind faith that what was detailed in that book is the word of Yahweh and you better believe it buddy boy or it’s a decent sized religious war you’ll have on your hands.
Fucking ridiculous. It’s actually more likely that there are real Snorks somewhere at the bottom of the sea than an all-omnipotent God overseeing everything. Evolution has produced some crazy looking critters, and who knows what’s down there in them Oceans.
The point is, if you want someone to believe in the extraordinary, the onus is on you to provide that extraordinary proof before you can expect the sceptics amongst us to believe it too.
But no, Christians, Muslims, Jews and so on are beyond criticism, cynicism and many other words ending in “ism,” they are extended a level of respect not afforded or enjoyed by any other group in any other walk of life.
Consequently, wars happen, people waiting to go to Spain on holiday get run over by burning Jeeps in the departure lounge and kids get raped on a daily basis by sexually ferocious Catholic Priests and all the victims can do is hope for financial recompense after they’ve satisfied the Catholic churches insurance policy assessor that they have indeed been sufficiently damaged physically and mentally to warrant a payout.
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