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We may have given up on politics in this country because our MP's are a dour bunch of grey-suited, sexually eccentric, megalomaniacs, but they're amateurs compared to their American doppelgängers.

Allow me to introduce you to Bob Allen; (I'm giggling as a write this) Bob Allen is a Florida State Representative and Co-Chairman of Senator John McCain's Florida presidential election campaign. He's also a guy who sponsored legislation that toughened penalties for lewd and lascivious conduct in public.

Bob was arrested on Thursday after offering to perform oral sex on an under-cover police officer for the princely sum of $20. Hee hee, you couldn't make it up. Only in American. Bob's excuse was that the officer was a big black stocky guy and the near-by park was populated by other big black stocky guys and in his blind panic he offered to suck one of them off to save his life!

So let's get this straight. A House of Representatives Congressman who championed a bill to toughen penalties for lewd and lascivious acts in public, has been arrested for offering to perform a lewd and lascivious act in public on a black under-cover police officer for the princely sum of $20 and his excuse was that he felt his life was in danger cause, you know, black dudes are crazy, so he offered to suck one of them off to appease him!?

I may have missed something here, but the last thing I think I would do if I was to be confronted by an enormous black dude who was looking to make me "just another statistic", --to quote Mr Allen, -- the very last thing I would do, would be to offer to suck his cock. Ha...I'm still laughing as I write this. He ought to thank his lucky stars he wasn't at the million man march. He'd have suffocated.

Bob is obviously a very troubled and emotionally damaged individual and to hide his sexual perversions, he's promoted this bill to increase penalties for sexual solicitations, and doesn't it make you wonder about other Congressman's legislation sponsorships? I think we now have a clearer idea as to why a Mississippi State Representative wanted the death penalty for the rape of raccoons and why a State Rep. from Montana was keen to see the sexual molestation of the recently deceased, met with life imprisonment. Me thinks thou doth protest too much chaps.

As political scandals in Florida go, I'd have to say I think this one beats the rigging of the Presidential election in 2000 when George W. Bush's brother Jeb, won him the keys to the White House. It's funnier at least.

Gaaaaaard bless Merca.