So I didn't win then and I still have turbulence in the bowels. I've never been one for the gracious loser speeches; even if I enjoyed being there and did my best, it's still shit to not get anywhere. As it turned out, I didn't do my best and once I was out, I didn't really enjoy being there. After my departure I was able to have a quick perv at a trampy looking package at the Black Jack tables who's breasts appeared to have volume enough to influence the tides, but really, I was so tired I just wanted to sleep.
It all started well, I was dealt pocket Aces in the first hand and got paid off nicely from the small and big blind who kept calling my bets, slackening my already loose bowels until showdown time when they turned over utter garbage and I parped in celebration and relief. And so it went until the break.
After the break it all went bandy. Fuelled by over-confidence and chili beef from the buffet table I launched myself into a pot which was as folly as the Charge of Light Brigade. I lost most of my stack in that confrontation and flung the rest in with Ace-King a little later which lost a race with Jacks and left me with nothing but a chip and chair.
Once I was out, I was able to have a good shit for myself while two Arabs stood by the wash basins complaining about a "slut" who evidently refused to become his property in exchange for four camels; seemed like a bargain to me, but I didn't say so. I then managed to get myself involved in two of the longest Sit 'n Go's in the history of small stakes poker. So long we actually had a break half way through and finished way after the main tournament had finished.
I'm pokered out now and on a two week hiatus while I improve Anglo-American relations and absorb some good honest English culture such as it is. Roughly translated that means I'm gonna teach an American how to drink and steal traffic cones.
It all started well, I was dealt pocket Aces in the first hand and got paid off nicely from the small and big blind who kept calling my bets, slackening my already loose bowels until showdown time when they turned over utter garbage and I parped in celebration and relief. And so it went until the break.
After the break it all went bandy. Fuelled by over-confidence and chili beef from the buffet table I launched myself into a pot which was as folly as the Charge of Light Brigade. I lost most of my stack in that confrontation and flung the rest in with Ace-King a little later which lost a race with Jacks and left me with nothing but a chip and chair.
Once I was out, I was able to have a good shit for myself while two Arabs stood by the wash basins complaining about a "slut" who evidently refused to become his property in exchange for four camels; seemed like a bargain to me, but I didn't say so. I then managed to get myself involved in two of the longest Sit 'n Go's in the history of small stakes poker. So long we actually had a break half way through and finished way after the main tournament had finished.
I'm pokered out now and on a two week hiatus while I improve Anglo-American relations and absorb some good honest English culture such as it is. Roughly translated that means I'm gonna teach an American how to drink and steal traffic cones.
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