It's been an indifferent weekend I don't mind telling you. I've ventured outside twice since Christmas day and come home disappointed both times. It's staying indoors for me now until at least January 4th...2035 no 3035 hahahahahahaha.
So anyway..on Saturday the Pigeon's Quiz ended in utter chaos. We lost by just a single point...again! Very controversial circumstances denied us a win. It made heavyweight boxing title fights in Vegas look like Scrabble night at the Women's Institute.
With just one question between us and quizzing immortality, we were asked the simple question.."What was the 2009 Christmas No.1." Paulie two thumbs had the answer down before quiz master Colin had finished asking the question; "Killing in the name of"... Simples.
But no..he gave the answer as "Rage against the machine," the name of the band!! We asked for confirmation..did he want the name of the song or the band? The song he replied, the song the song. Several teams had given the band name as the answer..much sighing and confusion ensued, a fight broke out in the lounge bar, a woman fainted, my mother played with her Christmas cracker spinning top toy.
In the end it was decreed "IT'S CHRISTMAS 2pts FOR EVERYONE." Pandemonium. Windows were broken, glasses were smashed, a herd of buffalo stampeded through the main bar, Stevie V.01 broke his pencil, my Mother continued playing with her Christmas cracker spinning top oblivious to the surrounding uproar. Ultimately though, we were refused what was rightfully ours.
After the police and stewards had regained control we were kept in losers corner until the rest of the bar was cleared and finally escorted out and to our vehicles an hour or so later and were home by 1am, although I'm told fighting did continue in the town centre deep into the small hours of Sunday morning.
You said you wanted the fucking song title: Angry quizzers remonstrating with quiz master ColinThe next one is in January and has already been declared a category A quiz by Thames Valley police. If Saturday's ugly scenes are to be avoided, quiz master Colin has got to start using the technology available to him and start checking his answers before the off or take Jeremy Paxman like control of the game and announce beforehand that his answers are Scripture, rightly or wrongly, otherwise the 'Respect Campaign' has been for nothing.
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We returned to the scene of the crime tonight for the more sedate but no less baffling Poker. I played a shocker. My second shocker in two nights. In my defense I've missed a couple of games and everyone had changed styles for tonight I can only assume as some terribly unfair practical joke on me.
Steve Peachy was looser than a student nurse on New Years eve for example and it was all too much for me. I took a painful shellacking and was back in losers corner before my buttock indents had had time to smooth out from the night before.
Relax this won't hurt a bit.* * *
There was the small consolation that Ronnie "the lamb" Baxter had given Dreamboy a slaughtering in the darts winning me a few quid. It's a shame of course for Paulie two thumbs that his relationship with Anderson will now end before it really began, as he'll surely have to concede now that he's just not the man he thought he was.
It's a shame it has to end like this of course, Paul's a mate and I don't want to see him hurt, but these things always end badly, otherwise they wouldn't end. It's for the best in the long run. And it's better to have loved and to have lost than to have never hit a double in a televised tournament. I think you know what I'm trying to say.
Ronnie Baxter: the latest average dart player to make Dreamboy look rubbishThese bets would be enough to finance a stab at a WSOP $1000 event should they come in and I see no reason at this point why I shouldn't be allowed to collect now just in case it goes tits up.
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In other news..with the new year just around the corner it's time to start placing those, "first celeb to die in 2010" bets. Surely Ferguson's heart must be on the brink of bursting?
I hope it erupts just as he's berating a fourth official for not adding enough injury time. God works in ironic ways so I fancy Him to blow the final whistle on Ferguson early doors in January and I'll be having £20 on at odds of 75/1.
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