I saw this sofa on Ebay recently. I liked it. Italian leather it said. Oooh I said to myself. They're the best at lounging about and doing nothing, I'll have one for myself. And for something which is supposed to cost £1000 I felt I was getting a good deal at £470.
Too good a deal as it turns out as the selling company it seems, are a bunch of crooks and made off with my hard earned tax money and left me with nothing but an empty living room and a quickly emptying bank account.
I think my flowers must not have been delivered to the universe yet. It's a good job I think there's more to life than money, but this is exactly the reason I don't interact with the general public anymore. There's no respect these days. No morals, no scruples, no nothing.
Obviously my trying to sell my soul for $1500 may at first glance seem a little exploitative also, but that's different. Anyone who's prepared to believe that someone could transplant their soul into a Smurf and pay handsomely to take ownership of it, shouldn't have money and I'm doing the world a favour be relieving them of it.
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